The Tales of Carmensakura

Like usual, it is a week filled with ups and downs. It was an alright week. Well, I have nothing much to say but that. So instead, enjoy this cute little video that can brighten up any day & put a smile on your face. It definitely made me smile. So hopefully, it will make you smile too.  

Well, life is full of up and down. Even in one week. Before my school started, I went on a one day trip to a hill where there is a japanese garden and a french themed place. I had a nice lunch. YUM. So, this really motivated me. And it reminded that this is my life. I can achieve anything I want. Yes, things may not be great now but that doesn't mean that they are impossible. I can do this. I can do all the things I want. I don't have to wait for the right moment because there isn't one. I can do this now. Since this is my life, I have to live it. I have to live it to the fullest. Then, university started. Things got rough because there were long lectures, difficult things that needed understanding and thick textbooks that require reading. And it is frustrating because it feels like there isn't enough time in the world. I got scared. What if I can't do this? But then, I stop myself right there. This is what I wanted. I will have

I just want to live. I just want to be happy. I just want to do everything so that I don't regret anything ever. But I can't. I can't do everything. It's simply not possible. Well, that's how I feel currently anyway. I feel extremely tired and frustrated. This two weeks were suppose to be a holiday for me but they were the worse holiday ever. WHY? I still had Sociology classes on Monday & Tuesday. So that took up a lot of time and energy. I wanted to write but I couldn't come up with anything good. I wanted to watch anime but time just feels wasted. I wanted to relax but my mind is pacing everywhere. I wanted to read but my mind couldn't enter the worlds. I wanted to study but I feel so tired. I wanted to exercise but my body felt heavy. I wanted to eat but I felt fat. I did these things in bits and pieces. And so, it felt unproductive and a waste of time. So yea. I have only felt frustrated lately. It's sad, really.

Sometimes, it's not about the words you say. It's about understanding. All we need in life, sometimes, is to know that they are people who would catch you when you fall and hold your hand when you cry. You just want someone to be there for you and to tell you that everything would be alright. And I am so thankful that I have friends who have been there for me. And I really, really want to repay them back by being there for them. I had "friends" last time that said that, "If you don't tell me that you are in trouble, how in the world would I know?" And I remember how that made me so mad. Because if you were my friend, you would know that I don't like telling my problems freely. I just don't because I don't want to burden or annoy you with my problems. The friends that I thought would be there for me, weren't. But the friends that I never thought would be there for me were and I am so damn thankful. Li