The Tales of Carmensakura

I have always love and enjoyed food. And honestly, it has always been one of my favourite things. However, I never really thought that I will feel this good with food now. I have used food to reward myself and even set the mood for the day. But right now, I feel like a complete foodie. I look forward to every meal. It's the high point of my day. And every bite of something makes me happy. I feel nourished. In this moment, I have started a new hobby of food journalling.  I just write down what I ate for every meal.  I don't know it just makes me happy to know what I just ate and how it made me feel. People usually record their food to calculate their calories but not me. I'm just doing this because it makes me feel nice. I am not sure if I'm just turning to food because I'm being quite stressed out or if I truly like food right now. Maybe, I just like to eat right now because meal times are my break time. I stop studying and take a complete brea...

We all know that stress is part of our daily life. Without stress, we wouldn't do much or have the motivation to do much. But we also know that too much stress is bad. I wouldn't say that I have great stress management but I would like to say that I manage it better with each year. However, sadly, I have to admit that I'm an emotional person and that my emotions does badly affect my body and my health.  I suppose that the stress have been getting to me.  But I think there are different type of stress. One, there is the stress that you can handle because you are aware of its existence. That means, you can hear the groaning and maybe even screaming in your head. Stress management for that isn't hard. All I need to do is breathe and probably just tell myself to stop groaning or screaming and just get the work done. But the stress that I hate is the stress that I am not aware of. Like, I don't hear groaning or screaming in my head. There's pretty mu...

To be honest, I expected that this year birthday would be relatively uneventful. With exams coming up, I knew that I'd probably wouldn't care about it. I never quite told anyone this but to be honest, birthdays aren't actually my favourite thing. And no, it's not because I don't like being a year older.  Some people hate birthdays because now they are a year older. I don't understand that because age is really just a number to me. The reason for me to not like birthdays is because, with every birthday, I reflect. I am a year older now. Have I done anything to deserve existing on this earth? Have I lived the life that I want? What have I done to deserve another year on earth? And sometimes, I just feel like I haven't done anything special.  I don't deserve being on this earth. Because I don't contribute or do something that's completely worthy or special. I know it's very harsh of me to think these thoughts but this thoug...

There are some seniors who think that I'm not stressed up for my exams. Well, they are wrong.  I am stressed. Just because I don't show it doesn't mean it's not there. If anything, I'm really stressed. Even my temper is flaring. Yes, I watch anime on Friday~! Yes, I do read articles once in a while. But that's because I'm stressed. And I need something to destress. So yea. Just because I don't look stressed doesn't mean I'm not stressed. Yup, this has just been a rant.