The Tales of Carmensakura

So many things in my life right now are new experiences. And with so many new experiences, you only learn more about yourself. It's never really about what happens externally but what happens internally. Because what will happen will happen. But what you do about it though is a different story. Funny thing is, I'm learning more about myself each day.  Some days feels like a struggle.  Other days don't feel too bad. But there is ups and downs. Like I will be honest, my internship has been hard on me. Personally, there are moments where I prefer to be dead than to be it. So I will admit that I am entertaining the thoughts of quitting. Whether or not I will quit for real, that is a different story. I know many will call me a crybaby for being a whiny piece of shit. Maybe I am. Maybe I am not. I do not know. But do not judge me. My feelings are valid and that is what matters. But I been in a bad mood lately.  So things haven't been great.

I am not sure if I'll ever regret this post. But I guess I'll post it anyway. Be warned though. It might get really lovey dovey because this is a post about love. And it might be long too. haha. I fell in love and I am in a relationship right now. It's funny actually how it all happened. It was a little insane. And the funny thing is, this was all completely unexpected. I did not see it coming at all. It just swept from under my feet and the next thing I know is that I am already tumbling into fate's plan. When I first met him, all I know is that I didn't know how important he would be. People always say that you would know immediately when you meet significant other.Did I know? Yes and no, I guess. People talk about that electric zing that they had. But for me, it was not something like that at all. If anything, it was a little odd. Even when I first met him, I felt comfortable. Very comfortable. It was as if I found home. A home that I didn't know e

I guess this is where you can say being an intern in a small firm is good. The reason for this is because they actually make you do real things. As an intern, I was expecting to be the coffee carrier, file arranger and photostating person. But to my surprise, I am actually auditing right now. I know I am in the audit department but I didn't expect to actually audit. Well, they give me the easier companies to do. Nonetheless, it's still complicated because I have never audited before. So all this is really really new to me. I guess being an intern is challenging because you are staring at unfamilliar things and they expect you to know and do things. But I'm just staring at it and going, ummm....now, what? I would prefer preparing the whole accounts by scratch than to audit because it's actually very complicated and tedious. But the good thing about being an intern is that I am definitely challenging myself. Personally, I admit that I am a person who has a

One week of internship has passed. And how was it? I have always heard people say to me, Carmen oh Carmen, what do you know? Working life is hard. Harder than you think. Maybe I can't say much yet because it has only been my first week. But is working hard? Is it as unbearable as some people make it out to be? I am in a small accounting firm. Most people say that being an accountant is the most boring thing ever. Well, what do I say to this? I say that it's bullshit. Work is hard because there are things that you actually have to do and it actually requires effort. But mostly, it's because I miss having my time to myself. And now, my time belongs to the firm and I can't do what I like such as napping or going online. But at the same time, I feel productive. Like I am actually doing something important that helps out. I am only an intern so I don't really get to do the big important stuff. I am just given simple tasks that most people don't