The Tales of Carmensakura

I know I'm one of the rare ones who have said that I enjoy adulthood.  As I said before, I enjoy the freedom of being able to steer your life to where you want it to go. Of course, the question would be to decide where you want to go? And honestly, I haven't quite decided. I really need to get that sorted out. Honestly, although I personally do like adulthood, some parts of it is definitely tough. The other day, someone said that I should start planning for next year and what I want to do? And what I want to learn? I always find that as an adult, time is a very valuable resource. But despite saying that, I end up wasting it anyway sometimes.  I admit that there is so many things I want to learn and do. And sometimes I end up not doing anything because I'm just so overwhelmed. Honestly, I don't want to choose sometimes. Because it means tossing away the other possibilities which I want I guess. I know, we can't always have it all.  But sometimes, I r...

I have been hanging out with some high school friends lately and because of that, it has made me think about that time. As I spoke to my high school friends, I can tell that their memories and mine were a little different. To be honest, if you asked me, if I ever want to return to my high school times, the answer would most probably be no.  High school. It was an interesting time. It was filled with bittersweet memories. It was youth at its maximum and for me, it meant that I was highly unstable and emotional.   To be honest, when I was in high school, my attitude towards school was definitely hostile. I just felt like I was wasting my time. So I didn't take my studies seriously. I played devils advocate in school discussions because I just felt like it. I broke some rules just to prove that the school wasn't the boss of me. I was young, immature and most of all, confused. The strongest memory I have of high school was when I was 14. It was a time when t...

"All I see is Green Lights. All I spit is real life. Bet you don't know what that's like. - NF" I was just thinking about where I am and my life. And this song by NF just plays in my head and honestly, that's how I feel.    I just got started with my journey with life. I know that I been alive for 25 years now but it only truly felt like it started about a year back.  And I did enjoy being an adult because although it was tiring and confusing, I like the idea of being able to do what you want. To be able to sit in the front seat with your hands on the steering wheel. To be the one in charge of your life.  I admit that I was confused, scared and filled with pride. I wanted everything and yet I was scared of everything. I was impatient. I wanted the world and yet, I didn't want to put in the effort at first because I was afraid of failure. And for a moment, I was worried that if I chose a path, I had to be committed to it and what if that path suck...